OnStand : The Sportsman's Watchdog

If you properly respect what you are after, and shoot it cleanly and on the animal’s terrain, if you imprison in your mind all the wonder of the day from sky to smell to breeze to flowers—then you have not merely killed an animal. You have lent immortality to a beast you have killed because you loved him and wanted him forever so that you could always capture the day.

—Robert Ruark, The Old Man and the Boy

Chapter 10

When you’re having a good time doing something you enjoy, time just gets away from you. Here we were having a great time out there on the river, when suddenly, without any warning, the season was over. Yeah, I know the dates are published, but I think somebody should be responsible for preparing me for the end of the season. A kind of advance warning system of some sort.

And, now I’m setting inside a house. I’ve never been inside one of these before. I’m in a big room with lots of soft chairs and a couch. I’m kind of off in a corner. It is nice and warm and it never rains or snows. A pleasant change.

But, not one I’m particularly happy with.

Mike and the Big Guy leave almost every morning about sunup. Mike comes back in the middle of the afternoon. He goes to school. He’s in the sixth grade and seems to really enjoy it. Oh, he’d rather be huntin’ but he knows he has to do well in school or there won’t be any huntin’, period. When Mike comes home he is almost always in a good mood and he and Ma sit in the kitchen and visit.

The Big Guy comes home a little later and he’s grumpy once in a while. He’s a salesman and the pressure is always on him. Ma sweet talks him and he has a beer and then he’s usually pretty much his usual self. I think I’ve gotten myself into an ideal situation.

Every night they turn on this electronic campfire, called a television set, and sit around and watch it. Some of it is pretty funny. Most of it is pretty stupid. Mike disappears about ten every night and the Big Guy and Ma usually stay up a little longer. They always watch the news. It ain’t so funny. There’s lots of serious faces and they talk about Russia, and Cuba, and missiles, and something called the economy. Then they change people and a smiley guy talks about the weather and then another smiley guy talks about football or basketball or baseball. How come nobody ever talks about huntin’? No decoy talk, no guns, nothing fun. This sure must be a serious old world we live in.

We made it through the spring and summer, and now the days are getting a little shorter, finally! I know what that means and, man, I am ready. Really ready! The Big Guy and Mike have been talking about getting down to the river and rebuilding their blind.

“Dad, it seems like we have to do that every year,” Mike said. “I don’t understand what is wrong with the old one.”

The Big Guy just laughed and said, “One of these years you’ll understand that there really isn’t anything very much wrong with the old one, it’s just that a man needs to build a blind every year or so just to stay in practice. That, and it’s a great excuse to get down to the river and do a little scouting.”

Mike must be starting to get a glimmer of understanding. He looked out in the kitchen to see if Ma could hear and then asked his Dad. “You mean like this coming weekend we could work on the blind instead of going shopping with Ma for my school clothes?”

The Big Guy laughed and said, “Sorry son, that’s your battle to fight. I don’t need any new clothes but I sure got a hankerin’ to work on that blind. I believe it’s more of a duty for me.”

Just then, Ma walked into the room, and looked from face to face, smiled and announced, “I know exactly what you two are sitting in here talking about. You’re talking about goose hunting. I can tell by the moon cycle, the time of sundown and the obvious looks on your faces. And you’re probably talking about how bad your blind needs rebuilding. Again. And you probably think you’re going to do that this weekend. But, my two boys, I think maybe we better get the school clothes bought and the yard picked up and the garage painted, don’t you?”

“Those items are all on the “tween” list. You know that one, it falls ‘tween fishin’ and huntin’. It’s not too hard on either of you, and it keeps me happy. And both of you know that if Ma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody in this house going to be happy.”

The Big Guy frowned, looked at Mike, and cracked up. “She did it again. Mike, don’t ever forget that your Ma has ESP. She pulls it off about four times out of five. Honey, I don’t know how you know what we were talking about, or why you should know, but you do. I guess about all I can say is, ‘Yes, dear’.”

Mike was laughing so hard at his Dad that he couldn’t talk. Finally, after slowing down his giggles, he said, “Dad, I think your “duty” just got changed. If I wasn’t going shopping with Ma, I’d sure help you rake or paint. I really am truly sorry about that. Maybe next weekend we can work on the blind, together.”

Chapter Eleven

And sure enough, next weekend is here and they’ve gone to the river. What a crock. They didn’t even ask me if I wanted to go. They just went. Sometimes people are so inconsiderate.

At least I’m close to the big bay window and I can see outside. I can see over the tops of the houses across the street and every once in a while I see a few birds flying by. I’m pretty sure I saw a flock of Greenwing Teal go by yesterday. That’s another good sign. Those little devils always come in early just ahead of the cool weather. And they don’t stick around long. I think they’re probably the smartest of all ducks when it comes to migrating. How they manage to stay just ahead of those cold fronts, I’ll never know.

The thing about teal that I really like is when they buzz the decoys or the blind. Man, ol’ Heinz used to get so upset at them. Whoozoomwhoosh! Over they’d go before anybody even saw them. I’ll never forget hearing Heinz talking in the blind. “Those blasted teal. Always sneakin’ in on a man. No warning, just that whoozooomwhoosh. Then they’re gone and all that does is leave a man hankering for some teal stew. They don’t make many mistakes but, thank goodness, they do make one once in a while.” Those guys always got their fair share, but I loved it when they got buzzed from behind. It was always good for a long session of turning the air blue.

The days are getting even shorter and I notice people are starting to wear jackets and sweaters every so often. That means it is getting cooler outside. My paint should still look pretty good. Heinz had just given me a fresh coat of paint last year. I can probably make it through this year, as is. The Big Guy, Ma, and Mike are really very nice. And being inside is OK, but, I sure do miss that shop and the visits Heinz and Grant used to have. They were an odd couple on everything but waterfowl hunting.

I wonder a lot about what happened to the others in our spread. I sure miss ol’ Gert. She was some looker. I hope she ended up half as lucky as I have. Maybe someday she’ll come floatin’ by, and I can try to visit with her. Fat chance!

I hear the guys coming in. Gosh, they weren’t gone very long. The Big Guy doesn’t look pleased at all and Mike looks like he wants to be anywhere but here.

“What are you guys doing home already? I thought you’d be gone till dark.” Ma hollered from the kitchen.

“Honey, you aren’t going to believe this, but some jerk got in on Smith’s ground just downstream from us and built a blind clear up at the fence line. It’s only about a hundred yards from our blind. They had to know ours was there. They built theirs right out on that high bank where it sticks out like a sore thumb. What a bunch of idiots.” Oh, the Big Guy is steamin’.

“We went over and talked to Tom. he said they were city fellas and were flashin’ a big wad of cash and offered him a big price for the lease. They told him that they had heard that this was a really good stretch of river. I don’t blame Tom for taking the cash, farming’s tough enough that you can’t pass up a deal like that, but it just makes me worry that we’ll have trouble out there this year.”

Ma gave him a big hug, and flashed that smile of hers at him. “Now you listen to me. You’ve had neighbors before and you always seemed to work it out. You really better give these men the benefit of the doubt and don’t go off half cocked or you’ll have trouble for sure. Maybe they just don’t understand where a blind should be placed. Maybe if you explain the situation to them, they would move it. Why don’t you get ahold of them and see what you can work out?”

“I guess it can’t hurt anything,” the Big Guy said. “I did write down their names and I guess it’s worth a phone call. I better wait till tonight until I’ve calmed down a little bit. It just burns you after you’ve hunted a spot so long and get it set up so right, and then have somebody come in right on top of you. But, you’re probably right, I at least owe them a chance.”